Here is a vintage post, I wanted to post just to try out a few new things I have put on here.
I was headed to class last night and saw (smelled) smoke from a fire. I was reminded of my last Sunday at the church I preached at in bible college.
You may remember in 1999-2001 there were terrible forest fires in central Florida. As we headed to church which was about 45 minutes away down way far near Disney we encountered thick smoke from a fire. We tried several different routes, all of which were closed due to smoke. We literraly couldn’t get through.
Strangely enough, 10 years ago was before everybody had cell phones. We weren’t able to get ahold of anybody at the church. We didn’t have a cellphone and neither did anyone at the church. The church met in a resort community clubhouse with no phone. We had to hope the people assumed we couldn’t get there on our last dagger because of the fires.
Ultimately, we went the next week for our last week. This memory is however forever smoked into my mind.
I was talking with Ronda the other day about something, I don’t even remember what, and she told me I was existing within a dichotomy. I laughed and told her that I posted something several years ago. I wrote this years ago when I was struggling to figure out what God was doing in my life and where he was leading me. I was struggling to get back into ministry and why it was taking so long to get back into ministry. Here is the vintage post re-telling where I was and the dichotomy that existed within me.
Last night Ronda asked me if I wanted to be in ministry. The context of the discussion is bigger than that, but suffice it to say that was the question. I responded that it didn’t matter what I wanted because God didn’t want me there, obviously. She said it does. Either God doesn’t care what I do for a paycheck or he wants me in a specific job. You can’t have it both ways she says. I realize that she brings a valid point to the table. Why am I propagating the dichotomy? Is is to make me feel better? Is it to protect myself from not being to do what i really want? Is it to make an easy way for me because I don’t want to step to the plate and choose the difficult road? Or is it because God doesn’t want me in ministry and I have no idea what he wants out of me, so I make up some crap in order to feel better about myself? Better about myself because I am ambling through life with no purpose and have no real feeling about why I exist and/or what I am supposed to do with my life. Why do I labor so over these things?
so here i am…
my family has recently re-located to st. cloud, fl. and i am stuck in gainesville to finish up my last few days at work. so it got the best of me and i decided to skip town (and work) and get to st. cloud to be with them. a reasonable solution. right, it was cold that evening. i am not sure, but i believe the weather was in the fortys when i left g-ville at 5pm. the next five hours that it took me to get to st. cloud were very cold. i started by stopping at a local western wear store on the way of town… hoping they would have chaps of the leather sort to keep me warm. no such luck. then i thought to stop at the harley dealer in ocala. got there 5 mins too late. then i remember that the bp truck stop at i-75 and the turnpike had chaps… or so i thought. it wasnt too far out of my way, so on i went. no chaps. they did have coffee which helped to warm me. then back on the bike. another stop in apopka for coffee (and another donut) and then on through orlando to st. cloud. drove past the airport. some punk in a camaro or firebird thought, ‘oh let me race the harley’, boy did he look dumb as i smoked him. finally made it home around 10pm. drank more coffee and cuddled up to the wife in bed. was very cold and did not warm up until the next morning as i took a hot shower and drank more coffee. at some point as i drove in the cold i thought to myself, ‘if you had to make this drive tonite, is there any other way you would want to make it other than on the harley?’ then i answered myself, ‘hizell no!’ i have realized that whether it is cold or wet or even cold and wet, there is no better way to ride than on a harley. what do they say in some circles: live to ride, ride to live… possibly.
anyway, check the pics (the 1 of the harley with bags on it are from the ride down) and let me know what you think about my midnight run of death inducng cold…
I deviated from the plan of blog posts for the week yesterday by posting about running (I’ll make up for it next week by posting a motorcycle post in the week of running posts), but here is an older post where I muse a bit about where motorcycles have gone. I hope you enjoy it.
Call me a purist, old school or just out of touch. Whatever you call me, just don’t call me late for dinner!
I’ve been reading about some of the new sportbikes on the market today. And almost all of them (the big bikes anyway) have ABS, traction control and various power modes. Really? The Japanese bikes are just catching on, but all of the European bikes have all these features.
I just about 3 different new bikes and they all have 8 different power modes and/or traction control modes. Really?
I ride a 1986 GSX-R1100. A friend recently did some work on for me and when I went to pick it up I asked how it runs. He said better. He said, ‘you know she’s a cold-hearted bitch right? She’s just plain mean!’ This is an accurate description of my bike. Cold, vindictive and unforgiving. Terms usually reserved for ex-wives, are the best to describe her. If it doesn’t need to be on her, I cut it off. I had a conversation with my mother-in-law while doing so work on her the other day. It was time again for the sawzall, I told my mother-in-law this is my favorite thing to do to my motorcycles: hack them up. It was only half a joke. I take a bareknuckled, barebones, balls to the wall approach to my bikes.
I have hacked the rear subframe and seat. Cut and shortened the seat myself. Removed any discernible tail section. Shortened the front fender and hair and removed the headlight/instrument cluster/fairing bracket. Removed all gauges and instruments except the speedo. Mounted headlights on the triple tree. Rattle-can graffitied the gas tank.
Sure, it looks like I did it… but it doesn’t look like anybody else’s bike.
Like it or not, it’ll catch your eye.
I was reading Genesis earlier this week and I was struck by the passage that speaks of God being grieved in his heart for having made man and sad/disappointed enough that he was going to destroy the whole world. Plants and animals too, not just the people. I wondered, what changed in his mind that he was ready to destroy everything but then a short time (cf 2 Peter 3:8) later he himself died for our transgressions.
I know Ephesians 1:10 says that at the fullness of time Christ appeared on the scene… but why was that fullness not when he was so moved to destroy everything?
Was it because he had not yet developed a relationship with his creation the dying for our sins would matter to us? Was it because he hadn’t imparted the Law and therefore we had no recollection of our transgressions for it to matter that he dyed for our sins? Was it to demonstrate the futility of life apart from him? Was it to show us that when we are left to ourselves we will self-destruct and destroy even the beauty of the world? Was it show that being a good, moral person who does what is right still isn’t enough without Christ at the center of our lives?
I don’t know.
What I do know I that God was saddened enough by how his creation turned out that he wanted nothing to do with it. I know that God couldn’t bring himself to destroy all of it (Noah & his family & the animals were saved). I know that God made a covenant (that is a deal) to never do that again. And he STILL died for our sins.
Whatever God’s reasoning, timing and planning were without we would not have the opportunity to know him. We also wouldn’t have a God who disappointment in the most of intimate ways.
God was sad.
He was disappointed.
Many of us have been there. Many of us know what God must have been feeling.
What better God is there than one who can say, “I feel your pain!”?